10/04/2005

good morning sir.

i know it's a stupid time to worry about this, especially when i have a bio test tomorrow that i haven't finished studying for, but i'm gripped by this terrible fear that i won't get into OCS (officer cadet school) after i finish BMT (basic military training).

sigh it matters a lot to me, because if i fail to get into medical school, which is my number one career option, my second option is to be a naval officer. and i just read on the navy website that if i fail to get admitted into OCS after BMT, my application to be a naval officer will be voided immediately. how how how.

there is nothing i can do! i must just make sure i don't kok up during BMT, and i must train hard now so i become adequately fit.

even if i wasn't planning a career in the navy, i'd be totally destroyed if i found out that i've failed to get into OCS, because my brother is already an army officer. my parents and relatives are all WAITING for me to become an officer too so that they can enjoy another commissioning parade. i don't want to let them down...

and it'd be for myself too. i've always admired my brother's officer's bars, the confident and easy way he returns salutes in his army camp, and how wonderful he looks in his army dress uniform with bright golden bars on his shoulders. gosh what if i fail what if i fail...

okay back to studying bio now. byebye!

kenny wrote this at 5:13 p.m.